Finally...

We are approved for real this time!

Wally needs to fix one typo  and then  we print A LOT of copies!

Well, the printer does! Progress at last!  Phase 3 here we come!

Can we print yet?

STILL waiting for FINAL approval from the agency to do the mass print of our letter. The waiting right now for this one step to happen feels like forever. We are getting so close to being in "the book" and yet still have so much to do. I met with a web designer today (thanks to our wonderful friend Shelley ) and it felt productive. I think I am frustrated because so much of this process is dependent on the talent, time and willingness of other people, including Wally who spent hours upon hours designing our beautiful letter. We think it is beautiful! Hopefully others will agree, and most especially we hope that a special woman will connect to what we have carefully written and shared and trust us enough to parent her child. 

paper

So I probably never would have known that there were so many different types of paper! My mission was to follow the instructions according to the agency regarding what the type of paper needed for the letter copies was. So I went to Office Max and stood staring at the millions of different options! We needed 100-110 pound bright white. Paper actually weighs different amounts??

So after the store clerk stared with me for a while we found 110 lb. , 92% white paper (which is basically like a card stock) Naturally, when I got home and Wally used it, it still wasn't right. Needs more shine and a brighter white!

Good Lord!

So I will be returning to Office Max today to see about a return and then trying a local Oakland store that specializes in just paper!

AND given that we are at this tedious  (and ridiculous)step of the process , yes, it does mean that our letter was approved by our adoption coordinator and we are trying to send  a final copy on the RIGHT paper for others at the agency to view so that we can move forward with our bazillion copies!! Yay!

My life with Youth

Well I think that God's way of sharpening my chops for parenthood is through my current work with youth ministry! In Feb. I began a very very part time interim position at our church as the Youth Activities Director. Basically it is what I was previously doing as a volunteer but paid with more hours and the responsibility of "holding" the youth events programming for things beyond Sunday am. It's good and I totally felt like I could handle it when I said yes . Now after two back to back weekends of major youth events, I still think I can handle it but I can say that less naively. For all of the years that I have been involved with youth ministry in the Episcopal Diocese of Northern California, Wally has done it with me . We have worked as a dynamic team to teens on major events as well we within our own parish community. This has been my first adventure without him in this arena and it's  certainly not the same.  But I do realize that it is  thanks to Wally that  this important addition of my life came to be. Both  the work I am doing now and the experience of learning how to do it, I owe to him.  I wish we were doing it together but because it is a solo mission right now, it makes the idea of co-parenting all the more exciting! I know the dynamic duo will return and with an age that we have never dealt with before so we will develop those new skills together!

 SO I just returned from a weekend in the snow with 7 teenagers  (who are terrific & loved using me as a snowball fight target!) and I am now home with  my little family of Wally & Soleil and ready for a new week of teaching dance to teenagers..... see the theme?

Real Stories

Last Thursday eve we attended our 1st Support Group meeting. The purpose of the group is to have a place for both waiting families and those who have placed to exchange stories and hear where others are at. We were one of 3 other waiting families in attendance and there were 5 that had placed over the last year and a half and they all had their new additions in tow! So cute! SO many little ones with such inspiring stories about how they got there. The amazing part to me was that each and every story was SO different from the next. So families had just been placed like 3 weeks ago and some were still waiting after   15 months for finalization! There truly is no norm and that is actually comforting for me because it leaves lots of mysteries and keeps my expectations in tact. We will have our own unique story to share as will our child.  Just as in a pregnancy , you really don't know what you are gonna get! 

Juno

What can I say? It probably sounds so cliche to brag about this amazing film but I am going to anyways. Even without the personal connection to the story , this film was so well crafted , clever and beautifully performed. Ironically , I went to high school with one of the executive producers and would love to be able to tell him what a gem of a project this film is! I really wasn't prepared however to sit and take in a story that could hit so close to home. A subject that I am so close to right now and probably will be for the rest of my life! It was very intense to try to inhale and exhale without feeling a little numb, sad, nervous, excited , and so damn curious as to how our story will unfold. I can only pray for a "Juno" like woman  to find us and in that moment of meeting, feel so clear that we are meant to be the parents of her baby and that she will find peace and comfort with that decision . 

PS- What a great soundtrack too! 

The triad

Part of our process in preparing for adoption and completing our homestudy is reading! Lots of reading! We both have many books that we own about various topics ranging from dance, theater and lighting to vegetarianism to religion and politics to the poetry of Shel Silverstein! W would love to spend more time enjoying these books but always seem to lack the time to do so. Then along comes this adoption process with all of this required reading and we are nose to the books! A lot of the materials speak about the process of open adoption vs. other types of adoption, the relationship of the birthparents with adoptive family and of course, the benefits of the child having knowledge about their biological identity and their adopted family identity. The books share millions of stories about the beautiful ways that families merge. Instead of reading about the typical things that perhaps families read while preparing for a  baby to be born like "what to expect... blah blah blah" we are trying to learn the language and responses as to how we will bring a baby into our lives as well as her/his biological mother and possibly father. I can only imagine that this powerful  triad will create all the more love and possibility in this child's life and I will continue to put the positive energy into the universe of what our expanded family may look like and pray that love will truly be at the heart of it!